No one ever told me grief felt so like Fear - CS Lewis

No one ever told me grief felt so like Fear - CS Lewis

- WOW -

I never put the two emotions together before.

Another new perspective on grief.

Missing someone.....

Missing someone.....

No matter how hard I try to not let his upcoming birthday bring me down I feel so sad.

I miss you so much Will.

Grieving correctly?

Grieving correctly?

A Birthday in Heaven

A Birthday in Heaven

As much as I dread the emotions attached to Will's upcoming birthday on March 1st, I have to wonder about birthdays in Heaven.  I would rather deal with the emotions attached to 10 Christmas' without him than deal with hirthday. There is such an attachment to Will's birth.  It was truly the greatest day of my life.  I never expected to be blessed with a second chance to be a parent. I was allowed to help deliver Will that day and felt so connected to him. 

But what does a birthday matter to someone who is in Heaven? What a crazy idea that he would even be thinking about his birthday on earth. 

My mind wanders.......

What cannot be said, will be wept....

What cannot be said, will be wept....

The discomfort that surrounds grief

The discomfort that surrounds grief

No rule book for grieving

No rule book for grieving

So True

So True

This graphic really hits home for me.

I hear the phrases that hurt much more often than I hear the others.  Like a 100 to 1 ratio! I don't believe people understand what they are say. They mean to be of comfort but some times feel like they need to say something. 

The dialogue is comfortable. We are not taught to deal with grief and we are not taught how to deal with grieving people.

What a grieving person needs

What a grieving person needs

Be who you are....

Be who you are....

Grief affects everything you do

Grief affects everything you do

Never apologize

Never apologize

Forwarded to me. Hard to believe.

Forwarded to me.  Hard to believe.

I had not looked at a lot of the e-mails that I received after Will's death.  Honestly, I turned that e-mail account into my spam account and just recently logged onto it.  WOW! No wonder I avoided some it. It was hard to read then and some of it is even harder to read now.  This was an excerpt of a message that was forwarded along to me.  Originally from one of my parents friends that drove from Birmingham to support Will's grandparents.  It is bittersweet to read.

I was able to attend Will Grason’s funeral in Dallas GA yesterday. I was informed that you three were able to attend the visitation on the night before. I felt that the funeral was such that you all would benefit from my message to you about this tragic event in the Grason family.

Upon arrival, I managed to work my way through a tremendous crowd, to speak with Bob And Barbara for a moment before the services. Needless to say, the emotional devastation was fully present both for the family, Will’s friends, and those of us with grandchildren susceptible to the trials of the life we share with the family.

The services began with Paige, a petite young blond friend of Will’s and her father singing to his memory. If my memory serves correctly, Will’s pastor presented some scriptures and prayers and then asked members of the family to speak about the young family member. His sister Nicole was first and she spoke of how this 9 year old had influenced her 24 years everyday of his life. His brothers, his uncles and aunts, his loving grandparents spoke. It is apparent that even at his young age, Will has proceeded to the place of the saints to step up and do what his Savior needs him to do. One of his family members told us that in each chair, we would find a sports trading card that was a Will’s gift to all of the friends attending his services. After the family spoke, their pastor asked if there were other people who wished to speak. Mark and Will are big wrestling fans and 2 professional wrestlers and a referee came forward to extol the cheerful young fan that they all knew. They intend to dedicate their matches to Will henceforth. Will is also a talented young man with a zeal for singing and a professional Karaoke DJ came forward to report that Will had become a regular at the karaoke club in Dallas. So much so that he was always introduced as “Bon Jovi” to the audience. Last evening, the karaoke session was to be dedicated to Will. Two of his teachers, one from last year and this year’s teacher, spoke about the extraordinary example that this young man made on everyone he knew. His pastor’s eulogy was so wonderful in its tribute to summarize and affirm all that had been said about Will, a regular boy with all the trappings of his age and gender. He spoke about his athletic ability and how competitive he was along with an abundance of kindness. He was talented and seemed to enjoy entertaining everyone and he could apparently work an audience. His pastor remembered a conversation he had just prior to his baptism a couple of years ago. Will knew who his savior is, he knew that he wanted to be with him someday, and he loved and understood the mission of Jesus Christ. Will knew how to smile and made it his job to bring joy to everyone. His family gathered around his closed casket, kneeling in prayer for each other and for Will’s journey home.

Kendall and I sat together and he can attest to the moving response to the recorded songs played at the beginning and end of the service. Mixed in with the familiar hymns, there were several popular songs that appeal to the tastes of young people ( I don’t have a clue as to who the artists are since I fit into the old people category! ). The most touching part was that all of the young people softly sang each of those songs along with the music in tribute to their friend. Will Grason. The positive response among the grief stricken family and friends made me wish I had been able to know Will. Obviously, he will be missed, but he will be remembered for a long long time. The general consensus is that everyone there looks forward to being with Will in heaven.

Silent tears....

Silent tears....

When grieving, a moment can feel like a lifetime

When grieving, a moment can feel like a lifetime